A Parent's Aspirations

This week was really great. So many reasons to realize I still have not hit my prime. 

1. Work is more fun than for a long time, in spite of more challenges than ever

2. Wonderful evidences of God's love coming from my calling

3. Amazing instruction and learning from visiting general auxiliary presidencies from SLC

4. Insight into my aspirations for my children as a result of comments from Sis. Stevens from the RS general presidency. 

First, work is getting more fun. I am spending more time working issues at an organizational level and less as the "grind out the details" level.  It is fun to see the impact and progress that can be had, and to work with, coach, and help others rise to new levels they had not seen in themselves before. Additionally we have more problems than ever, with some very serious, but it is fun to take those on, and to be a spot of positive light amidst the gloomy outlook of so many. It actually becomes fun to try and see what we can solve and work to ensure a strong foundation for the next generation of leaders. 

Next, I have had a wonderful few weeks where evidence of the atonement is clearly working in the lives of others. They have deep and sincere desires to become what He wants them to be. And they are succeeding. There are challenges and setbacks, but overall there is wonderful progress and I work hard to help them see that when they don't always see it in themselves. When we focus on Christ all other things can settle down and get put into their right place. Not be made into an overwhelming problem but to be made to be a challenge we can win. 

Third, we had Sis. Cordon, Sis. Oscarson, and Sis. Stevens from the primary, YW, and RS visit our area Friday. Great leadership training and then a wonderful general women's session. It was a great treat to attend with mom and to spend so much time with her. It is at times like this that I more fully realize the "pleasing word of god" and it's Lon term affect on me and what I truly desire. 

Last, Sis. Stevens talked to us about what our aspirations were for the sisters of RS. As I pondered this it made me go into a revelatory mode that helped me begin a list of what aspirations I have for my children. I have created for myself a vision of values and learnings that have and will guide my life. But this caused me to think about what I want most for my children. So....please think about these and consider how they are in your life. And work to bring further "joy" to your fuddy duddy dad. 

Here they are, my aspirations for my children:

1. Have a bedrock understanding of the doctrine of Christ

2. Know how to qualify for, receive, and act upon personal revelation.

3. Not only be saved by grace, but be changed by grace. 

I am sure that this list will grow over time, and there are others to add, but it is a remarkable start. If you really want to please your dad you will send me a note with your thoughts, personal evaluation, and honest intentions of where you are/will work to be better in these and where you are not currently planning on changing. 

I love you all forever,

Dad

3 John 1:4

A thought this week

As I was working on my talk, and as I was going through this week, I was listening to conference from October. One talk caused me to ponder quite a while.  It referenced the Latin root castus which means to purify, and also is tied to the word we know as chaste. To chasten then is to purify. 

When I pondered on this I eventually rested on the scripture in Hebrews 12:6. Whom I the Lord love, I Chasten. When we think of the Latin root we come to:

Whom I the Lord love, I purify. 

Quite the change in any train of thought I have previously had in my life. 

It is remarkable how we can continue to learn and understand throughout our lives. I hope you never stop learning.

I spent my whole talk discussing our personal journey of conversion. It is remarkably similar to the doctrine of Christ. Faith, repentance, baptism, and the gift of the Holy Ghost followed by enduring to the end. We keep following that path and it continues our personal journey of conversion. 

Love you forever,

Dad

3 John 1:4

Reflection Quiz

I was in bishopric meeting today and as we sang this song it caused me to reflect deeply. I have been very familiar with preach my gospel and the chapter on Christlike attributes. Especially the quiz section as a tool to reflect on how we are in our own lives. Then I thought of the words and how this is another self reflecting quiz that can enable us to reflect and grade ourselves on how we are doing, and where we  could improve. Think of the words in that way. How would you grade yourself?

1. More holiness give me,

More strivings within,

More patience in suff’ring,

More sorrow for sin,

More faith in my Savior,

More sense of his care,

More joy in his service,

More purpose in prayer.

2. More gratitude give me,

More trust in the Lord,

More pride in his glory,

More hope in his word,

More tears for his sorrows,

More pain at his grief,

More meekness in trial,

More praise for relief.

3. More purity give me,

More strength to o’ercome,

More freedom from earth-stains,

More longing for home.

More fit for the kingdom,

More used would I be,

More blessed and holy--

More, Savior, like thee.

Is has been quite the week. Busy as ever at work, and challenging as I shift roles to do very different things and spend more time on leading and challenging and supporting than doing projects as of myself. I have done that in a way before, but it has been some time. 

I got the trim work finished as Kingreys to complete the parts that he could not do, or was not comfortable doing. That was part of Saturday and then we shopped for food storage and hauled that around during a better part of the rest of the day. And my body feels all of it. Getting old has its pros and cons. 

We had BYD tonight and we have so many questions they ask that we are getting behind in having time to answer them. Really good questions and really good discussions from all the youth. It's great to have so many that work so hard to discover for themselves. 

I had a remarkable experience during the sacrament today. The power of the atonement is so real, and the power in our lives to exercise faith for ourselves and others became so real. Sometimes our own pleading can be exquisite as we exercise faith and draw upon the blessings of heaven. They become real in our lives as we step forward with an eye of faith. 

This weekend is the barn campout for the YM. I am suffering parental withdrawals as these things happen and I have no son to go with me. It's a challenging time for me. It's really an adjustment that I am not prepared for. It has been so long. 

Thank you for all you do. The choices you make, the good you do for others, the joy you bring to me. 

Love you forever,

Dad

3 John 1:4

Wonderful Week

This was awesome!  Mom got home from a wonderful week being able to see Skjelse and Jeff and that was so nice. I am glad we have both of you!

I had a fun time with Ty and Alysia as we worked the week without mom. We don't do near as good a job but we made it. Alysia was a gem to cook so much, and she did wonderfully. We sort of kept up on laundry and dishes. Ty helped shop when we needed a few things. We certainly did our best by happy to have the master back. There is so much that happens in a home and I am eternally grateful that mom is such a good one at organizing a home where peace prevails.  I also got to talk to Kieren a couple times since mom was not home I answered the calls. Short calls as she walked home but nice to hear about things in life. 

This weekend was one of the two best of the year. I love conference and all that comes from it. I appreciated many of the talks in many different ways. Some for me personally, some for our family, and some for my calling. It always helps me look forward with a brighter outlook for the future. I appreciated Pres. Uchtdorf's talk at the women's meeting on fourth floor, last door.  And the way we need to keep moving forward regardless of the challenges along the way. Whether a challenge in our life, a question we have, or other things, we need to persevere and the blessing will come. I also liked Elder Stevenson and the challenge to replace some of the screen time in our lives with a study of the Book of Mormon. There were many others with messages that helped me consider what I need to do differently to be a better person. 

It was a crazy week at work also. It is the time of year that we do annual performance reviews. So I had to do mine, as well as add the supervisor comments to 7 others and to deliver the review to those 7 and so it took a huge chunk of the week. Plus the rest of the work does not stop. But all in all it's going well. I see more and more how what I learn in the gospel makes me better at work. To be wiser, more supportive, more of a critical thinker, and more of a leader and follower at the same time. I am grateful to have the gospel that helps in all aspects of my life. 

I have seen this week how we can use the atonement to heal so many things. From small to great it can help move us beyond the dismay or the discouragement to see a brighter future. 

Love you all forever, nothing can change that. 

Dad

3 John 1:4

Crossing the threshold

I had a great week but the end of the week was even better. I was gone all week for work, and I am so glad to be back home. I love it here. I really am a homebody. 

It was really nice last night to talk to Skjelse for so long. It was so nice to hear such a positive outlook regardless of the circumstances. Sometimes we just have to be grateful IN our circumstances. 

While I was away I was able to get a bunch of Belgian chocolate from the factory close by our work there. It's the factory blems that I get but they are delicious. We have to be careful to eat it slowly!

While headed out to a dinner we stopped at the American cemetery monument at Henri-Chappell. As we walked toward the burial grounds we went through a pillar and roof section and when we crossed the threshold the most remarkable spirit washed over me. It was so unexpected and so powerful. It was a sacred experience to reflect upon the nearly 8,000 dead buried there, and the additional nearly 5,000 that are missing in action that are engraved on the pillars. 

I even found one with the spelling like Skjelse for their last name. 

I didn't expect it to be much of a stop, but it had a very sacred feel and the way they kept the grounds was remarkable. What care they give it in respect for the fallen buried there. It was impeccable.  

We had a nice time doing a garage sale for Larry Scott. Not really a sale, it was a giveaway. So I spent my time trying to get people to take more stuff. It was funny. Tons of things from the 60's, 70's and 80's. Some seriously vintage stuff. We got people who wanted about 2/3 of it and then took the rest to goodwill. We also earmarked the value of it for the refugees in the area.  

I got to have a home cooked Italian meal when I was over in Europe. I work with Enrico Fracarri and he invited me over. I had asked him in the past what they really eat on a normal day. So we made the meal for me. It was wonderful. He, his wife and Matteo their baby. We had pasta with a tomato sauce with bacon and onion that tasted very different but really good. Then this dish (with picture) which I forgot the name but was really good. Thin cut veal topped with prosciutto and basil. The they fry it from one side, then just enough on the other to crispy it up good. It was wonderful.

 I learned in Italy they always have the correct order of dishes, and they do one dish at a time. Not all on the plate like we do. But do the pasta first, then meat, then salad, then sweet. Not necessarily all required, but in that order. It was very nice. 

I had a wonderful Sunday with great councils to help with direction and decisions. Bishopric, Ward council, and bishops youth council. All were really good today with open discussion and lots of input. I really like it when many will share their insight and viewpoints before we make decisions. We also had the primary program today. It's always a pleasure and fun to witness. I had to give closing remarks which I expected to be super short because I thought they would be way over. But they ended 15 minutes early. Scramble!!!  I took up about 5 or so on the spot but then just let us end early. But a really nice day. 

Love you forever,

Dad

3 John 1:4 (I got to use that in an interview today:))

Underlying Doctrine

I have pondered recently and seen come up multiple times this week, how so many things in life are misunderstood, become challenging, cause frustration or disappointment, harbor hurt, cause doubt and overall create strife that could be resolved when an underlying doctrine, clearly understood, would help to resolve the question, or help to ride through the challenge. For example many discussions I listened to this week were about the primary and how some love it, and others feel isolated, some challenged and feel disconnected etc.  how some feel like they need a break from kids and don't want to be around them. If we all had a better understanding of the underlying doctrine of the family, and the realization deep in our hearts that we are here to become fathers and mothers, then the hard feelings would not appear because we would find joy in the eternal roles of father and mother and relish in the opportunity to be in that role. 

It struck me how we constantly are admonished to teach the doctrine and how it links with what I just described. If we teach the doctrine, it will be more understood. When it is understood challenges and difficulties become lessened and we ride through them with an eternal perspective since we know the doctrine. It is like at work. We can treat symptoms all day, we can try to overcome issues, but until we get to root cause, all we do is chase ghosts. They appear and reappear as fast as we think we get to them. But when root cause is identified and treats, then the issues are eliminated and we move to other things. 

Learn and teach the doctrine. It will serve yourself and others now and forever. 

I had an epic fail in trying to serve and surprise mom. Lys and I drove for a few hours down into the countryside east of Cincinnati to buy a replacement truck bed to fix the rust on the one we have. I found a great deal for a reasonable bed. Then I negotiated a body shop to fix the small issues, paint it to match and even remove the old and install the new one. I was supposed to get the bed, take it to the shop, and next week it would be done and mom would not have to see it at all. All the arrangements were lined up, perfect!  

Then we stopped at home for a few hours until I could take it to the body shop and get Ty to pick me up ( he was at the music conference ). I got anxious and went to check the AC clutch bearing that was causing more and more noise. So I decided to pull it, and if it really was bad I could get a new one and get it all fixed and have the AC working right. Well, in pulling the clutch pulley off the pulls actually came off the bearing instead of the bearing coming off the shaft. So now I have a bearing that is pressed into the shaft, with a clutch coil around it that is help in place by a snap ring that is behind the bearing that is stuck. So I have no option. It's dead. And I have to order a new compressor, orifice, and receiver/dryer. And the truck can't run because the belt is off. So I am dead in the water. And mom sees the truck in all its glory!  And it will be like that for a week while I get the parts. Such a great try though!

Love you all forever, 

Dad

3 John 1:4

Self Analysis

Wow have I had that point driven home today. As I have talked with and counseled with different people, I have sure seen that when people are honest, and when they open up, they are quite perfect at self analysis and able to determine for themselves the things they need most to do. Either they come to talk because they know they need to change, or when talking anyway, they come up with the things they need most to do to help them get where they want to go. It's amazing how they can analyze self so well when they open up and are honest with themselves. To excruciating detail.  I am able to just encourage and support but they make their own path forward. 

I was also struck today by how much others seem to fight against what the church tries to do when all we are trying to do is help others and encourage all to come unto Christ and live up to the privileges available to all as we qualify for them. But many spend significant energy and time fighting against it. When I think someone or something else is way off the mark, I give them no time or mindshare. I go on with that which is most important. It has been so for long periods of history that fighting against that which is right consumes some while those who are just trying to do their best quietly move along and try to better themselves. As I have said before, too often we focus on improving others and serving ourselves instead of serving others and improving ourselves. How wonderful would the world be if we all did the latter?

While listening to a talk this week I was struck again by the way the power in the priesthood is exercised by women and men alike, and only by being together to complete one another can we really live up to all in store for us. An eternal partnership that is wonderful now and forever. If we form it under the proper authority and live worthy of those promises. 

Remember daily the qualification to enter the temple and never let them out of your sight as you go through your day. They will keep you happy and progressing forward. There is so much to be learned there and I am just beginning to realize how much more there is for me to learn. 

Love you all forever, have a great Labor Day tomorrow. 

Dad

3 John 1:4